Special returning guest Margarete joins hosts Aureo, Irvin, and Sierra to take a deep dive into everyone’s favourite blond Death Eater and peacock fanatic: Lucius Malfoy
In this episode:
- Lucius is a secret Hufflepuff
- What is Lucius’s priority, hair styling or doting on peacocks?
- Lucius is the Percy Weasley of the Marauder era
- We try to understand Snape’s and Lucius’s friendship
- Lucius’s eeeviiil plan
- We need fanfic about Draco writing in Tom’s diary
- Albus Dumbledore: Lines have to be Drawn Somewhere – A Guide to Running a School
- Lucius is so terrible, he radicalizes house-elves
- Australia is the place to be when Dark Lords come back
- Turn the diary into a scrapbook!
Resources:
- Dumbledore’s Master Plan: Part 3 by Steve Connolly
- What Did Dobby Know? by Josie Kearns
- Jason Isaacs Weighs In on Lucius Malfoy’s Fate After the Battle of Hogwarts by Josh Weiss
- Be My Bad Boy, Be My Man by Lokifan
Irvin’s books:
- Preorder now: Malfoy: The Most Treacherous Family by Irvin
- Dumbledore: The Life and Lies of Hogwarts’s Renowned Headmaster by Irvin
- The Phoenix or The Flame – a collection of essays from authors incl. Irvin
The Pub’s Jukebox: A Gift for Lucius by Draco and the Malfoys
Do you think the diary horcrux has a way to compel people to write in it?
I don’t think so – it seems to me you’d have to open yourself up to the horcrux by taking the initiative to write in it. Otherwise I’d guess that it would’ve gotten someone to write in it in the preceding decades.
I wonder what would have happened if Lucius planted the diary in one of Harry’s books rather than Ginny’s. Do you think Harry would have turned the basilisk loose on the school without meaning to? One would hope that Harry would have noticed he has one book too many and he would turn it in to a responsible adult. Imagine if he gave the book to Lockhart! That man would set the basilisk loose and then would blame Harry for the whole debacle. I look forward to reading your analyses, Irvin and Absent Minded Raven!
Thanks Irene!
To answer your question – I imagine Harry would have tossed the book into a corner somewhere, as a blank diary he didn’t need, and that would’ve made for a much quieter year at Hogwarts.
The only thing that compelled Harry to write in the diary to begin with is the suspicious activity surrounding it. First, he finds it after someone tried very dramatically to get rid of it by throwing it in a toilet (oooh, must be dangerous or incriminating!). Then he notices that the ink spilled on it has disappeared (oooh, must be magical and mysterious!). Without those things drawing Harry’s interest towards the diary, I can’t imagine why he’d bother with it.
That is probably true. I still think it would be funny (or maybe not) if Ginny turned the book in to Lockhart and good old Gildy would have been chatting with Voldy. I can foresee Tom sucking up Lockhart’s soul and emerging from the diary “very much alive.” That would definitely make for a new plot!
Oh, Lockhart would be the easiest target Tom has ever encountered!
“Dear Gilderoy, you really are the most beautiful, talented, and famous wizard! You know what would make you even more successful? Being the hero who saved Hogwarts from the Chamber of Secrets… but you gotta open the Chamber first, to rescue people from it!”
TBH, I think Gilderoy could’ve become a willing coconspirator with Tom!
I am beyond humbled that you all have raised toasts to my comments three times in a row. Thank you all for letting me be a part of your show, if only vicariously. I love submitting my thoughts and waiting anxiously to hear if my comment was chosen again!
Thanks for being part of the show and providing such great comments!
Second that Harry would have largely ignored the diary if Lucius had planted it on him. Fortunately, Lucius is the sort to try and optimise his plans, so when he sees a way to tie the Weasley family into the whole mess, he’s more than happy to adjust.
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I like the theory that Draco wrote in the diary, and it encouraged him to present it to Lucius, but (as the linked essays discuss) Lucius was planning this before Draco came back from first year. Besides, if Draco knew about the diary, there’s no way he wouldn’t have let something slip during the polyjuice incident.
An unquestioned assumption that everyone seems to be making is that Voldemort told Lucius about the diary. I think it more likely that Tom Riddle (aged 16ish) told him, and encouraged the plan after learning about Harry Potter (“…killing mudbloods doesn’t matter to me any more… For many months now, my new target has been – you.”).
That’s because the assumption comes from Dumbledore, and most of those do remain unquestioned. From HBP 508 –
I think it makes sense that Voldemort would’ve had to share some info about what it was with Lucius, if he wanted the item actually safeguarded as opposed to getting chucked into the Malfoy Manor crap closet.
Just re-emerging from hibernation with some random thoughts:
If HP was owned by Disney, they would 100% do a film on Lucius’s villain origin story, and that would be it.
Welcome back!